Couples find beginnings of eternal families through adoption
By Sarah Moss, Staff WriterShare:  
January 11, 2010 — The terms "Latter-day Saint," or "Mormon," are usually synonymous with large, fruitful families - something not so surprising since a major portion of the Church's teachings and traditions focus on the family as central to Heavenly Father's plan for His children.
As Latter-day Saints, we are encouraged to go forth and multiply, to raise future missionaries and servants unto the Lord. We are taught that being married in the temple and creating an eternal family is one of the most important steps in our progression toward returning to our Heavenly Fathers' presence one day.
However, getting pregnant isn't as simple as 1-2-3 for some couples. While it comes quite easily to some, for others, it can be a long, arduous process that can often end in heartache. Some couples resort to fertility treatments, often costing vast amounts of money on procedures that only occasionally work. For many couples, infertility can be a devastating hurdle as they endeavor to expand their families.
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) 7.4 percent of married women up to the age of 44 are infertile, or unable to conceive in a consecutive 12-month period. So what happens when having a biological child is no longer an option? Does this mean that certain couples are left without the blessings that come from raising an eternal family? Does this mean that they will have to wait until the next dispensation to experience the joy that one feels when holding their child?
Certainly not. When natural childbirth appears unlikely, there is hope. Eternal families can also be built through adoption.
Many LDS couples are turning to adoption through LDS Family Services. Adoption through the Church is the same as adoption through any state operated or private service, but with a religious focus. Our Heavenly Father's plan is openly discussed and all children who are placed through LDS Family Services are put into LDS homes, then sealed to their parents for time and all eternity once the adoption is legal and final.
The employees at LDS Family Services are all active and temple worthy members of the Church, and all of the prospective parents are as well. Bringing children into good, gospel-based homes is the primary focus at LDS Family Services. The agency works with birth mothers in a compassionate manner to ensure that both parties are treated with respect and sensitivity. Birth mothers and couples can agree to maintain communication after the adoption.
Adoption through LDS Family Services is also more cost-effective - up to 75 percent less expensive than through a traditional service. Brad Reimer, a counselor with LDS Family Services in Spokane, said he has seen the blessings that come as a result of adoption for both the adoptive couple and the birth mother.
"There are positive byproducts with a capital "P" and a capital "B," Reimer said.
Eric and Jenny Nygard, currently living in the Sixth Ward of the Spokane Stake, were married a year-and-a-half when they discovered that they were unable to conceive. Still wanting to have a family, the Nygards felt strongly that they needed to look into adoption, and were approved to adopt through LDS Family Services in June of 2005.
Eric and Jenny Nygard pictured here with their children, (left to right) Aubree, Andrew, Travis and Tanner. Contributed Photo.
Four months later, Eric was diagnosed with testicular cancer and was successfully treated. In mid-December they learned that they had been picked by a birth mother to be the adoptive parents of their baby, and just four days later their first child, Aubree, was born. Less than a month after becoming Aubree's adoptive parents Eric's cancer returned and he had to go back into treatment. Eric and Jenny feel strongly that the arrival of Aubree came early because without the medical clearance from their doctor, adoption wouldn't have been possible.
After Eric recovered from his second bout with cancer, the Nygards were able to adopt their second child, Tanner. Five months later, Eric discovered additional, non cancer-related health problems that required surgery. During the week leading up to Eric's operation, Jenny wasn't feeling well. On a whim, she decided to take an old pregnancy test she'd had on hand for a couple of years and to her shock, it was positive. She was pregnant! This pregnancy came as a complete surprise to the Nygards, as well as their doctors, who all thought that Eric's health struggles would have made fertility impossible. That said, Jenny and Eric now have four children - Aubree, Tanner, Travis and Andrew. Three were adopted, and one is biological.
"Being pregnant and having two young babies to take care of really helped me to be distracted from Eric's health problems," recalls Jenny. "On October 24 we celebrated Eric's four year anniversary of when he was diagnosed with cancer. I can't believe that it was four years ago! It seems like forever ago. When Eric was first diagnosed we had no kids, and on his fourth anniversary, we have four kids. It is so awesome how greatly we have been blessed."
For Ryan and Alicia Nelson, of the Bowdish Ward in the Spokane East Stake, the adoption of their child is coming a little slower. They have been approved for adoption through LDS Family Services for the past seven months. Though the Nelsons knew from the beginning of their marriage that adoption would be the only way they would be able to have their eternal family, LDS Family Services requires that you be married two years before you are allowed to start the process.
Ryan and Alicia Nelson are currently approved for adoption through LDS Family Services and are waiting to be chosen by a birthmother to become adoptive parents. Contributed Photo.
The Nelsons then had to wait through the approval process, which can be quite grueling for some couples. But now they have a profile with the Family Services, and are anxiously awaiting their child.
Sometimes Church members make comments to childless couples that can be interpreted as insensitive. It's easy to forget that having a family doesn't come as easily to some as it might for others. Ryan and Alicia have dealt with such comments for years and both have their own way of dealing with them as they wait patiently for their time as parents to come.
On their experiences thus far in the journey toward starting their family, Ryan and Alicia stated, "We feel it (is) a blessing to be involved in this inspired program. Educating people and dispelling myths about adoption are two of our goals. We look forward to being parents and know that the Lord has prepared children to join our family. Both of us have firm testimonies of this and we look forward to the day when we can take our children to the temple and be sealed for time and all of eternity."
As many couples can testify, a true "family" isn't just created through a pregnancy and birth. For some it is made through adopting their children. As Heavenly Father teaches us to raise eternal families by any means we can, the act of placing a child into a childless home exemplifies the spirit of sacrifice and love taught by the Savior. In the process, eternal families begin to grow.
To learn more about adoption through LDS Family Services, call Brad Reimer at 509-926-6581. The LDS Family Services Web site - http://www.ItsAboutLove.org includes information for birth mothers and prospective adoptive couples.
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